Otro camino que va a ninguna parte

It seems I'm really gonna have to learn how to live without heart... Now that you don't appear on facebook... I don't know what I'm gonna do with my life... I mean, yeah! of course I can write you an email, and be sure I will... but I'm sure too that you're not gonna see it... I'll try to stop myself for a couple more of days... but... I don't know if I will be able to life without knowing what happened... Please... Please... PLEASE! just appear... and tell me hi... don't worry, this time I'm not asking for anything more than a friend (and maybe a best friend). I promise I'll be good and I will not try anything, I will not say the things I used to tell you... but just come back... I really need you...

No, I'm not fine... And I miss you like hell... I feel like there's nothing good on me... Like I'm never gonna do anything right... And I don't have the strength to continue just because I know I'm not gonna succeed... Can I only ask for a hug and a "everything's gonna be okay"? I don't need anything more... Really, I'm tired of hearing empty words (especially from you) like, you are amazing, you don't need to change, you are beautiful or things like that... I only need you... You have no idea how you've changed my life... For I month I felt like I could own the world if that was what I wanted. And all because of you... But now... I don't know... When you act like before I'm scared, 'cause I'm not sure if you mean it or not... I just... I just felt like I gave you my heart... Really... It's a bit weird to explain but I feel I gave you my heart some time ago and now I only have a hole on my chest. I can't feel ...

Tell me... What happened to you today? What made you act like if everything was fine again? What happened yesterday? Was it? You know... even I said thanks yesterday... You didn't help me a lot... It fet pretty bad in fact... Cause I knew you didn't mean it and it hurts... And... I'm wondering why you had to act that way... I was completely broken and I was so desesperated looking for help... Help that I can only get from you, the only person that knows me 100%... but you acted like there was nothing wrong... in fact, I finished telling nice things about you when I was feeling that there was nothing good in me... What can I do when I'm broken and the only person that can repair me makes me fall again and again? And what about today? I mean... you acted like we were still us... Like everything around us whas the same as a month ago... And... It felt fine... and you can't imagine how bad I want that to happen... You have no idea of how much I need to hug you.....

No te imaginas la de veces que te he envidiado... De verdad... Creo que a los 5 minutos de conocerte ya te envidiaba. Conforme pasaron los días te envidiaba más y más... Él sólo te hacía caso a ti y yo sólo pensaba: Ojalá fuese ella... Pero no, nunca llegué a ser tu y él no me hizo caso alguno. ¿Y sabes que es lo peor de aquellos días? Quúe erais perfectos, lo sabía yo y lo sabíamos todos, por eso te envidiaba tanto. Pasó el tiempo y todo se enfrió. De ti nunca supe nada más... bueno sí, pero no porque hablásemos o algo... Él ya se encargaba de contarme lo perfecta y maravillosa que eras. Y te envidié... Me odiaba por no ser tu, por no poder ser igual de maravillosa que tu, por no ser perfecta, porque él no se fijaba en mi. Y luego todo cambió. Siendo yo la única que estaba allí para él, sólo se fijaba en ti, una y otra y otra vez. Y al final te consiguió y sabes qué, me alegré por él. Había conseguido lo que tanto ansiaba y por fin era completamente feliz.  Ahora que ...

Porque eras la única persona a la que realmente podía llamar amigo. Por eso te echo tanto de menos. Porque ahora cada vez que me siento sola no hay nadie que me diga: eh! Aquí estoy para ti, para lo que necesites. No tengo a nadie que me abrace cada vez que siento que no hay nada bueno en mi... Joder, te echo tanto de menos... Y ya

I thought you were moving to a far place on Earth. I was afraid and ready to miss you like hell. One day, one normal and boring day, you appeared near to one of my closest friends. You lied. You were moving near to my place. I couldn't believe that. You were really there. It kinda scared me but having you there was so amazing. I'm not sure but I think we hugged and smiled to each other, it was a really nice moment. I think then the time passed and... I don't really know why but we were trying to know if we were something pretending we were more than friends. I remember feeling happy and special and full of joy. You were finally by my side! I remember one day that I gathered all my strength just to stay at your side and slowly grabbed your hand. I was so nervous: what if you didn't want to grab mine? But you did it! You were so shy in that moment, I can remember your red face and that little smile... So handsome! Then I started to draw circles in your hand, what a...

El primer día de colegio, subí las escaleras de la mano de mi madre tan contenta y feliz porque empezaba el "cole". Una vez en la puerta de la clase, al ver a todos mis compañeros llorar, empezó la pesadilla para mi madre. Lloré como nunca había hecho y mi madre, la pobre, se sentía fatal por dejarme allí. Yo toda rebotada no se me ocurrió nada más que morder a mi profesora dejándole los dientes marcados todo el día... (Helena, ho sento molt). De Infantil recuerdo la servilleta de los desayunos, las camas del medio día, las toallas que hacían de manta, el patio rosa, la castañera, el tren de les lletres, el director disfrazado de Sant Antoni, mis primeras colonias!... Pequeños detalles que a veces, me hacen sonreír. No nos engañemos, el primer día de Primaria no lo recuerdo. Pero recuerdo que en esa época fui a Disneyland Paris por primera vez, algo realmente digno de recordar. Los gupis que teníamos en clase, aprender a contar hasta 100, la entrada del Euro (y los cuad...