I would like to say I hate you...

After two days you replied me saying "I'm bad, so bad, my wallet was stolen". I tried to made you feel better, give you some advices and... you only refused them... And of course it hurt... Ah! And you didn't ask how I was... My dad always says "If you don't wanna know, don't ask" I think that's the reason you never ask these days.
Some hours after that a friend of mine talked to me... He seemed interested in my life but he really wasn't, he's just the worst person I'm gonna ever meet. I really hate him... I'm not gonna say he deserves all the problems he has 'cause that's not true but... I think he looks for them (I'm not sure if that makes sense...). But that conversation killed me and the little happines that I had.

Then... on the afternoon you sent me a picture... You know how I feel about that... And it hurt just because you know my thoughts about it. Then you accused me of hating some people (including you)... That hurt too.
I sent you a pic with my halloween pumpkin on it but I went to bed before your answer. At 7:04 I got up and activated the data on my phone I saw your reply: "Wow! :)". It didn't hurt but I asked myself why didn't you say anything more... Then I turned off data again and sleep till 14:40. When wifi was working I discovered a "Good morning :)" message form you from 7:34... I think it't the worst sentence I've heard in some time. It made me feel so empty like I was really nothing...

Since you started your travel, I've been feeling bad... Yep, so really bad. Nothing goes fine and you are not there when I need you someone to tell me "everything will be fine". This sucks a lot. I can't live with you 'cause you are not who you used to be, you don't care about me anymore... but I can't live without you 'cause when you are not here, I feel like there's no sun, there's nothing to fight for...

I'm not sure where is my heart now. I don't know if you have it. Maybe you forgot it in your house and that's why I feel so lonely... I'm hoping your mum or sister finds it and sends it to you just so you can take care of it and give it warmth... It's been feeling so cold lately... And if you have it with you... Then send it back to me... I can't live without my heart and my heart can't live without care...

I would like to say I miss you because I do.
I would like to say I hate you... but I love you.

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